Power-Schmoozing Your Way to the Top If you want to get in good with potential clients, you've got to schmooze it up. Here's how to do it without making enemies.

"Never allow a person to tell you no who doesn't havethe power to say yes." -Eleanor Roosevelt, American FirstLady, 1884-1962

Twenty-first century networking and marketing is a tough, edgygame that requires planning, execution and follow-up. There's alot more to successful networking in today's competitivemarketplace than just "suiting up and showing up." If youwant to learn the insider secrets and shortcuts for becoming apower-schmoozer to save yourself time and money, read on.

News flash: Everyone wants to conduct business with people theylike who offer services or products they believe in using. Ifpeople like you, they'll help you. If they don't like you,they won't. Power-schmoozing is a highly developed skill thatdevelops trust and deep levels of rapport with people who will, inturn, help you with some aspect of your business.

Remember that networking is not selling. Networking is aboutmeeting people with whom you can begin to build a relationship overtime. If you attend a networking event with that "hungrylook" in your eye, people will avoid you. In fact, ifyou're too aggressive in your card-gathering efforts, peoplewill avoid you.

If you want to become a power-schmoozer, here are somefail-proof suggestions for you to follow:

• You need a good business card and a 10-second elevator pitchthat introduces you: "Hello. I'm Catherine Clark. I'mthe regional vice president for Coo-Coo Clocks Unlimited inCincinnati. We design, manufacture and ship more coo-coo clocksthan any company in the country."
• A successful power-schmoozer attends networking events with theattitude that they are attending the networking group to contributetheir time, talents and expertise to a group, to get involved withthe group and to be of service to them. They also let the people atthe networking group know that they are attending to learn from thegroup. If the people in the group think you're there to selltheir attendees anything, you will fail to create mutuallybeneficial relationships and you'll strike out before thesecond pitch.
• Power-schmoozing takes time. Attend networking events as if youare on a relationship-building campaign. If you make a minimum90-day commitment to become a power-schmoozer and you attend twonetworking groups per week over that 90-day period, you willdevelop a minimum of 10 new contacts that you can begin to developover time.
• Next comes the part that separates the wanna-bepower-schmoozers from the ones who succeed at high levels. Afteryou have identified a few people who fit your criteria forrelationship development, then begin a personal campaign aroundeach one of these individuals by sending them articles in the mailthat might interest them, asking them to lunch, offering your timeto help serve them in their affiliate networking groups, sendingthem birthday cards, and e-mailing them updates or things thatmight interest them. Your job as a power-schmoozer is to develop aprofessional relationship with at least 50 new people every year.By demonstrating your value to these individuals, you are buildinga quick history with them through your efforts at personalcontact.
• If you're a widget salesperson, don't go to too manygatherings of widget salespeople-they already have their ownwidgets. Go to groups to meet people that can help you with someaspect of your business.
• When you attend a networking function, don't talk to anyonefor more than eight minutes. You're there to work the room, notchitchat. You will have the opportunity to demonstrate your valueto these new people at a later time, but not the first time youmeet them.
• Eat as early in the networking event as possible so you cantalk to people.
• Meet people by standing near the food. People like to talk whenthey're eating.
• Ask the people at the registration desk to give you the namesof the leaders of the group. When you see them (or spot their nameon their name tag), introduce yourself.
• Listen 80 percent of the time and talk 20 percent of thetime.

Phyllis Davis coaches senior-level executives through hercompany, ExecutiveMentoring and Coaching Inc., and has taught corporate etiquetteand protocol for the past 28 years. She is the author of theforthcoming book E² The Power of Ethics and Etiquette inAmerican Business, available from Entrepreneur Press in Spring2003.