What I Learned About Leadership as a NCAA Division 1 Soccer Referee In the high-pressure moments of Division 1 soccer games, I've made split-second decisions — a skill that is invaluable in business. Here are some key leadership lessons from my experiences.
By Trevor Rappleye Edited by Carl Stoffers
Key Takeaways
- Whether in high-stakes soccer games or business challenges, maintaining composure is crucial for setting a stable tone for the team.
- In both refereeing and leadership, what you tolerate becomes the standard.
- You don’t need to be harsh to command respect.
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As the CEO of FranchiseFilming.com and a NCAA Division 1 Soccer referee, I've come to realize how much both roles have shaped me into who I am today. You wouldn't think that refereeing soccer games and running a seven-figure business would have much in common, but the lessons I've learned on the field have played a massive role in how I lead my team and run my company.
I've been refereeing since I was 13, officiating everything from local youth games to national cups and televised NCAA tournament finals. I've had moments on the field where I've been booed, yelled at, and forced to make split-second decisions that can change the course of the game. But that's exactly where I've learned some of the most important leadership lessons that I use every day at FranchiseFilming.com.
Here are some of those lessons, backed by real experiences I've had in both refereeing and business.
Stay calm in the heat of the moment
In soccer, especially in high-stakes games, the pressure can be intense. Players are heated, coaches are yelling and fans are screaming. As a referee, I'm expected to stay composed, no matter what's going on around me. If I lose my cool, everyone else will, too. That same principle applies in business. When things get tough, your team is looking to you for stability.
I'll never forget the day in 2016 when an employee challenged me in front of the entire team. She asked me, "What do you even do all day?" — with an attitude that was disrespectful and unprofessional. I could have reacted with frustration, but I didn't. Instead, I stayed calm, addressed it later in a one-on-one conversation and that employee ultimately left the company. Once she was gone, the culture improved dramatically. Staying calm during that moment set a tone for my team that I wouldn't engage in negativity — and that's something I've carried with me ever since.
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What you allow sets the standard
In soccer, if I don't deal with a reckless tackle early on, the rest of the game can spiral out of control. Players push boundaries and, before you know it, things get dangerous. What I've realized as a leader is that the same thing happens in business. If you allow behavior that goes against your values, you're essentially telling your team it's okay to do the same.
I once had an employee who refused to follow our dress code or update our processes. I let it slide because he was talented, but what I didn't realize at the time was that I was setting a precedent for the rest of the team. Before long, other employees started to ignore processes and policies. It wasn't until I finally addressed it that things got back on track. As a leader, you have to be firm about what's acceptable — because what you allow sets the standard for everyone else.
You don't have to be harsh to lead
One of the biggest misconceptions about leadership — and refereeing — is that you need to be tough or aggressive to command respect. But I've found that's not the case. I don't scream at players or throw my weight around on the field. Instead, I try to build rapport by talking to players early in the game, explaining my decisions. It sets the tone that I'm approachable but firm.
In business, I take the same approach. I've worked for bosses who would come in late, high, and yell at their employees. It created a toxic environment where everyone mirrored that behavior. I promised myself I'd never run my company like that. You can lead with empathy, kindness, and understanding, while still setting clear boundaries. You don't have to be rude or dismissive to lead effectively.
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First impressions matter
I've always believed that how you show up matters. When I'm refereeing an NCAA match, I show up in clean, professional attire. I greet the coaches with a smile and a handshake. It's not just about looking the part — it's about setting the tone from the very beginning.
As a business owner, I see first impressions as crucial. If I don't take care of myself, how can I expect my team to take care of our business? I stay in shape as a referee because I believe in leading by example. If a CEO can't keep themselves healthy, how can they expect to keep a company healthy? It's a small thing, but it's about sending the right message from the moment people meet you.
Don't be afraid to make tough decisions
One of the hardest parts of refereeing is making decisions that you know will be unpopular, but that are necessary for the integrity of the game. I've had to make last-minute penalty calls in big, televised games, and those decisions aren't easy. But leadership requires making tough calls, even when they're not the most popular ones.
In 2020, I had to make one of the hardest decisions of my business career. We were doing weddings and B2B work, and I had to turn away a $50,000 deal to fully niche down into franchising. It hurt, but I knew it was the right decision for the long-term success of FranchiseFilming. If niching doesn't feel a little painful, you're probably not really committing to it.
It's ok to be wrong
One of the biggest lessons I've learned as a referee is that it's okay to be wrong. There have been times when my entire crew has told me I made the wrong call, and I've had to reverse my decision. It's humbling, but it's also necessary. No one gets it right 100% of the time, and acknowledging that doesn't make you a weaker leader — it makes you a stronger one.
In business, I've found that admitting when I'm wrong creates a culture where my team feels comfortable doing the same. When I own up to my mistakes, it shows my team that it's okay to make errors and that the most important thing is how we grow from them. Leadership isn't about being perfect; it's about being human.
Your leadership sets the tone
Refereeing has taught me so much about leadership — lessons that I apply every single day as a business owner. From staying calm under pressure to making tough decisions and leading with empathy, my experiences on the soccer field have shaped the way I run my company.
Whether you're managing a soccer game or leading a business, remember this: the way you lead sets the tone for everyone around you. Lead with kindness, make the tough calls, and don't be afraid to admit when you're wrong. Your team—and your business—will be stronger because of it.
